Growing Up Petruzzelli

"Its not the critic who counts...is not the man who pointed out how the strong man stumbled,...Credit belongs to the man who really was in the arena, his face marred with dust, sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs to come short again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming. It is the man who actually strives to do the deeds, who knows great enthusiasm and knows the great devotion, who spends himself on a worthy cause, who, at best, knows in the end the triumph of great achievement. And who, at worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and cruel souls who know neither victory nor defeat."

Teddy Roosevelt

I've thought much the last 3 weeks as to what I would write. For me, its been a tough month or so, trying to get out of a rather nasty funk. Deciding how I wanted to be defined, as I realized that simply being known for overcoming obstacles wasn't enough, being an athlete wasn't enough, same with being a coach. Its not enough. There has to be more to every person besides what they do for a living or what they have faced in life. I don't know that I have found my answer, but when I read the above quote, it reminds me of how I grew up. The people who helped define me and continue to do so, even though we don't spend much time together. My family. Our family may not have an official motto, but the words of Teddy Roosevelt are pretty spot on.

 I have been mulling over what to write for about a month, but in the last couple weeks, with the advent of Project Revolution, "Letting Beauty Speak", and the truly wonderful ideas and comments I've received from you ladies, I thought it was time to get the family all together. Why is this email all women? Well, if you were to ask my 10 year old niece and goddaughter Isabella, I have 6 bosses - my grandmother, my mother, my sister, Isabella, her sister VV, and the latest addition, Kara. That's a lot of bosses, but I know I wouldn't be the man I am today without them. So I've grown accustomed to "listening to the woman". 

However, there is something unique about being a Petruzzelli, as has been most recently evidenced by my work with Kara. Its been said, more than once at the club, that we are exactly the same, except one is tall and attractive, and the other is short and hairier. I take that as a point of pride, as it reminds me of something very special, coming up a Petruzzelli. And in doing so, we have a way of inflicting ourselves upon others, being pragmatic, yet strong willed, with a pretty good sense of humor, straightforward, honest, somewhat rough around the edges, but otherwise, a family of big hearts and even bigger shoulders. Last night, Kara and I laughed and reminisced about what it meant to grow up a Petruzzelli, and the good, the bad, the joy and the pride it brings.

Many of you have heard me say, I possess no physical gifts. I am not trying to be humble, I'm being honest. I am not tall, yet I possess my father's broad shoulders and strong legs. I have my Uncle Tony's barrel chest. I have my dad's long arms, but short torso. I look less like a professional triathlete than I do a rodeo clown. And I have made my peace with that. But that is what has fueled me, and every Petruzzelli I know to do one thing we are certain we are capable of - outworking anyone. I remember every story of my grandfather Guy, whom I'm named after, whom Kara's father is named after, working tough hours in a place straight of a Damon Runyon novel. My grandmother, working while raising 4 kids, in a small apartment on Taylor Street, a few blocks down from my mother. A family of hard workers, fighters, survivors. 

I remember my father working 3 jobs to provide a better life for us, my mother working, close to home, yet still working, to do the same, my aunts and uncles, on both sides, always working, the immigrant mentality of hard work providing a better life. Through it all, was the prevailing "ridiculous optimism" held by my grandfather Guy, who was known to do things like watch his shows on a STEEL television, with his feet in a foot of standing water, smoking a cigar. And when confronted by my mortified grandmother simply replied, "What's the matter with you?!" In this small snippet, you can see why we are the way we are. Ask Kara how often she moved as her father worked tirelessly to become one of the foremost experts on wiping out cancer. We never knew another way. Giving up just wasn't an option. So we had no choice but to plow ahead. 

What has given me hope, joy, and a sense of wonderment is watching Kara, my sister, my nieces, maintain that same mentality, simply putting their head down and getting to work. (My sister isn't always thrilled with VV's 'stubbornness' and its understandable, she's 4 going on 38) For my sister and Kara, they took a huge leap of faith and dove headfirst into Crossfit, trusting their older brother, and Godfather respectively that I knew what I was doing, that they could do it, and more, and then boom! They show up and just get it done. Its not to say every workout is filled with parades and rose bouquets, but their willingness to jump in with both feet is why I look to all of you and say - this is all doable. You are all only scratching the surface of your ability, not simply athletically, but as women, as leaders. 

I've been very fortunate to have come up the way I did. I was lucky to have strong women around me, successful women, proud women, tough women. And I believe that's why Kara and I look at all of you and say, openly - there is a great deal more to this life. My family was living UNSCARED before the term became in vogue. Because there wasn't really any other option. To those who have been training with me, all of you have become, well, Petruzzelli's. I see it in moments, be it in your words, your posture, your smiles, or your mean mugs, but its there. And its beautiful. 

Many of you have heard me reference my grandmother Laura. Our matriarch. At 101, she will whoop my ass, and doesn't care one bit how fast I can run or ride, or how much weight I can lift. And neither does my mom. They want to know that what I am doing now is helping those who don't see the greatness in themselves look inward, discover hope, discover who they really are. I want to go out saying "I lived everyday like it was my last, I cherished every friendship, for those friendships become more over time, they become family, that as long as I made a difference in one person's life, than I have succeeded." I didn't develop this mindset on my own. Its in my DNA. From my grandfather, to my father, to me. 

In our family we laugh as hard as we cry. We celebrate as grandly as we mourn. I couldn't imagine life any other way. 

I hope all of you find a way to all come together and share your stories. The women in my family would be proud of what the women I train have accomplished - they are trailblazers, pioneers, like you are, in breaking down stale, misplaced and distorted images of beauty by becoming beauty through movement, not by what is on the cover of some ridiculous fashion magazine. Its quite a site. They are on the brink of creating a ripple, a ripple of true change, a paradigm shift, one that women have been deserving and waiting for, for decades. To be reminded, there is no ceiling, there is no limit. There is, and only will be, up. Sounds like something we learned growing up, isn't it sis? 

For now, its back to training, breaking through my own personal barriers. But I'll never forget where I came from. I wish the same for all of you.

With my deepest love and gratitude,

Guy