So, its Valentine's Day, and I have a few words. Before I get too deep into this blog, let me say, I am not a relationship expert, by any means. In fact, for the family members and freinds who read this blog, they will quickly point out at how awful I am at them. I have failed at more relationships than Elizabeth Taylor has. So, what qualifies me to write on the topic? Well, my experience in doing the wrong things, can help you avoid the same mistakes, and because its my blog, so I can write whatever I like.
Now, I know we are all aware as to what "holiday" today is, its been with us, since the New Year. We were barely getting over bowl games, when we started to get bombarded by jewelry commercials, or flower adds, or whatever else comes with this day. I have discovered that, for whatever reason, we need to announce holidays months before they actually occur, as if we will suddenly forget Christmas, or Thanksgiving. Thank God for Target, or whomever else puts out endless ads 4 months before the actual holiday, otherwise, I think a lot of us would be walking around aimlessly on December 25, not sure what to do.
Anyway, for those of you in relationships, and a multi-sport athlete, its time we got down to brass tacks. First, for my fellow 3 or 2 sport friends, if you are starting a new realtionship, and your new mate is not really aware as to what your sport entails, let today be the day you have the "talk." Now, we all know what "talk" I am referring to, its usually the one that occurs the day you are supposed to go to your girlfriend's cousin's wedding, for which she is a bridesmaid, and you have to get in a 5 hour ride, and waited until 6 am, day of, to tell her. We all know what happens next, lots of tears, bad words, complete shock, you might get a shoe to the head, or, up your, well you get the point. Here's the deal, the season is close, you are probably starting your build period, so, tell them now. Prepare them for what really happens. Don't sugar coat it, explain what its all about. If they are understanding, great, and if not, neither of you need to waste anymore time, and can part ways amicably. Trust me, that is far better than, coming home from that 5 hour ride, to discover your clothes in a burning inferno on your front lawn. Trust me, replacing a wardrobe costs more than buying those new race rims.
And that leads to the second part of the talk - explain how much this sport costs, not just in time, but in money. Your significant other may be thinking about a nice little getaway this summer, on a secluded beach, when you have already allocated your money to stuff for the sport, i.e. new Scott Plasma, new Blackwell Race Rims, new 2XU wetsuit; you get the idea. And your idea of a "getaway" means, open roads to ride for hours and trails to run, or, a bug race weekend. The thing is, if you aren't honest from the start, inevitably, you will both end up frustrated, hurt, feeling a sense resentment and alone again. You shouldn't have to hide your sport and everything it entails, because when you do, brother, when it does come out, oh, the tidal wave of aggrevation that comes with it, makes the sound of a pen in your skull sound pleasant.
Now, this is not all about you, remember. If your partner, after they take a collective deep breath, agree to stick it out, take them at thier word, but let them know, that if at any point, they can't deal with it, its ok. Not everyone thinks getting up at 4 am to race on a rainy Sunday morning is a great time. Be cognizant of that. But if they are staying with you, make time for them too. For example on this holiday, if they say they are supportive, get them a little something that will help them feel connected to the sport; a true part of it. Buy them some really cool casual gear from Sugoi, or any of the gear companies, that bears the same tag as your race kit. I am not suggesting to get them a tri kit and and a wet suit, but, look into some of the more fashionable and sport-like items from those companies. That way, they see you appreciate their support and want them to feel a part of it.
For those of you who are dating, are considering dating a multi-sport athlete, or are married to one, this is your day to show them how much you care about them too. Here's the deal though, don't buy us more gear, we have enough, and we will most likely get our own. Unless your partner asks for some, find him or her something fashionable to wear, that didn't come from the latest Cycling World catalogue. Multi-sport athletes, especially the more elite ones, tend to dress, on a regular basis, as if a race is going to break out at any minute, and they need to be ready for it. I am no different, I have found my 2XU long sleeve running shirts to be preferred wear, and the next thing I know, I am in racing flats, a technical t-shirt, and either jeans or running pants, as if I was walking up to the start line. So get that special athlete something else, a sweater, a shirt, jeans, something, anything, that is not made out of Dri-Fit material. And I have found it best to avoid discussing the bigger ticket items, like the bike. To avoid hate crimes on this holiday, don't ask if you special someone could use anything new for their bike, b/c the answer is always yes. Listen, I just got myself a new bike, all carbon, a real beauty, completely tricked out, but if someone asked if I needed something for it, I'd be all over it. We are tech junkies, so, avoid that, b/c inevitably that seemingly innocent question will have you pouring over websites or visits to the local bike shop looking at pedals, bars, stems, and cringing at every price tag. Trust me on this, you love each other, don't discuss the bike.
So, my dear friends, that is my advice for this Valentine's day. Is it going to work? Hell, I don't know, its never worked for me yet, but, maybe one of you will get lucky. Just remember, candy and flowers can be given any day of the week, you don't need Hallmark to remind you to get that special someone in your life a gift. You can do that anytime. But for this holdiay, try my advice, and maybe I will too. Happy Valentine's Day.
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Why the Grammys Restored my Faith in Music
First, let me start by saying that, for those of you looking for something related to multi-sport today, let me tell you, stop reading now. You will be dissapointed.
This past Sunday, as I was lying around on my couch, fighting a miserable sinus infection, and realizing there was nothing on TV, I begrudgingly put on the Grammys, thinking it would be another sad festival of talentless singers - yes Britney, I am talking about you, and lame hosts. However, this year, was a pleasant surprise, at least for me. Now, I didn't really care who won what awards, I was interested in the performances. Besides, the Grammys are as bad college football Bowl games, there are way too many awards, and even the mediocre are getting one. I remember old Grammy shows, where, people like James Brown did his "7 capes" act, and it took 10 minutes, but damn if you weren't glued to the screen. I thought those days were gone. Until this past Sunday night.
So, when I watched Tina Turner and Beyonce light up the stage, I was loving it. "Proud Mary" never sounded better, and I think Beyonce was having a tough time keeping up with Tina. It was awesome. Then, watching Kid Rock sing with Keeley Smith, trying to duplicate Louie Prima, it was such a treat. Not to mention the Foo Fighters, who lit up the stage, and say what you want about Kanye, I still loved "Stronger" and "Mama", and there were more than a few tears on that one. Besides, how couldn't you like Daft Punk, in those space suits, hitting computer screens as Kanye was rocking the crowd? And I know Aretha Franklin looks like she swallowed herself, twice, she still has the pipes to carry a tune. However, for those music savvy people out there, Aretha was missing singing that final gospel tune - James Brown. Anyone remember what movie that song made an appearance? That's right the Blues Brothers, and it was James Brown who was setting fire to that stage. And lest we forget, Amy Winehouse, who, for all her failings, and there are many, she sounded phenomenal.
Which brings me to my most recent revelation - we, as a society, give a pass to those who are talented, truly talented, when it comes to thier personal issues of drug or alcohol abuse, or whatever other debauchery they involve themselves in. Think about it, Amy Winehouse is not the first really talented artist with a drug problem; anyone remember, oh, Janis Joplin, Eric Clapton, Jimi Hendrix, James Morrison, Keith Moon, Guns and Roses, Aerosmith, Alice in Chains, etc, etc. But, like all those who came before her, she too, gets a pass because she has true talent. If she sucked, like Britney, then we would pummel her with bad press, and call her callow, demented, twisted and in desperate need of help. Now, a blind person could have seen Amy was not all there in her performance, as she stumbled on the stage like a drunkard in a Hunter S. Thompson novel. But, she held it together long enough to belt out that soulful voice, almost with a Motown feel to it, and in those moments, we lost sight of her addiction, and just heard the music. The key for her now, is to maintain that talent, and not become another Courtney Love.
But look at how hypocritical we are - we bash Britney, and we just want to hug Amy, and leave her be, to express herself, and her music. Listen, I am not trying to waive the flag for that hill-billy disaster, but, the disparity is laughable. The thing is, we have been doing for so long, we don't even realize it. Was anyone really worried about the drug problem that beleagured the Rolling Stones? Hell no, we just wanted more "You can't always get what you want", and we didn't care what type of narcotic it took them to produce it. I am not sheltering myself from this, I am the same.
Case in point - I love Velvet Revolver. Just as I loved Stone Temple Pilots and Guns and Roses, the mixing of the 2, has been great. But, when I went to see them in November of 2004, it was pretty clear that Scott Weiland had not kicked his heroin problem. He got on stage, in a theater that was about 50 degrees, and in 15 minutes, he went from wearing about 4 layers on his torso, to being shirtless, and sweating like he was performing on the sun. Now, I know stage lights are hot, but c'mon. The thing is, my buddies and I laughed it off, and just sat there loving the music. But, if they sucked, all we would discuss is how drugs are ruining the band, and how Scott needs to get clean, and blah, blah.
My point is, lets check ourselves a bit before we start making judgment calls on artists, when we know we love them. And have some faith in music again. I was so skeptical about the inudstry, feeling like no one would perform unless they got paid ungodly sums of cash, but, to watch the Grammys, you felt the music alive again. And for a little while, I forgot I was sick, and just loved the show. So, find out where your favorite band is playing, and go see a live show. Its good for the soul.
This past Sunday, as I was lying around on my couch, fighting a miserable sinus infection, and realizing there was nothing on TV, I begrudgingly put on the Grammys, thinking it would be another sad festival of talentless singers - yes Britney, I am talking about you, and lame hosts. However, this year, was a pleasant surprise, at least for me. Now, I didn't really care who won what awards, I was interested in the performances. Besides, the Grammys are as bad college football Bowl games, there are way too many awards, and even the mediocre are getting one. I remember old Grammy shows, where, people like James Brown did his "7 capes" act, and it took 10 minutes, but damn if you weren't glued to the screen. I thought those days were gone. Until this past Sunday night.
So, when I watched Tina Turner and Beyonce light up the stage, I was loving it. "Proud Mary" never sounded better, and I think Beyonce was having a tough time keeping up with Tina. It was awesome. Then, watching Kid Rock sing with Keeley Smith, trying to duplicate Louie Prima, it was such a treat. Not to mention the Foo Fighters, who lit up the stage, and say what you want about Kanye, I still loved "Stronger" and "Mama", and there were more than a few tears on that one. Besides, how couldn't you like Daft Punk, in those space suits, hitting computer screens as Kanye was rocking the crowd? And I know Aretha Franklin looks like she swallowed herself, twice, she still has the pipes to carry a tune. However, for those music savvy people out there, Aretha was missing singing that final gospel tune - James Brown. Anyone remember what movie that song made an appearance? That's right the Blues Brothers, and it was James Brown who was setting fire to that stage. And lest we forget, Amy Winehouse, who, for all her failings, and there are many, she sounded phenomenal.
Which brings me to my most recent revelation - we, as a society, give a pass to those who are talented, truly talented, when it comes to thier personal issues of drug or alcohol abuse, or whatever other debauchery they involve themselves in. Think about it, Amy Winehouse is not the first really talented artist with a drug problem; anyone remember, oh, Janis Joplin, Eric Clapton, Jimi Hendrix, James Morrison, Keith Moon, Guns and Roses, Aerosmith, Alice in Chains, etc, etc. But, like all those who came before her, she too, gets a pass because she has true talent. If she sucked, like Britney, then we would pummel her with bad press, and call her callow, demented, twisted and in desperate need of help. Now, a blind person could have seen Amy was not all there in her performance, as she stumbled on the stage like a drunkard in a Hunter S. Thompson novel. But, she held it together long enough to belt out that soulful voice, almost with a Motown feel to it, and in those moments, we lost sight of her addiction, and just heard the music. The key for her now, is to maintain that talent, and not become another Courtney Love.
But look at how hypocritical we are - we bash Britney, and we just want to hug Amy, and leave her be, to express herself, and her music. Listen, I am not trying to waive the flag for that hill-billy disaster, but, the disparity is laughable. The thing is, we have been doing for so long, we don't even realize it. Was anyone really worried about the drug problem that beleagured the Rolling Stones? Hell no, we just wanted more "You can't always get what you want", and we didn't care what type of narcotic it took them to produce it. I am not sheltering myself from this, I am the same.
Case in point - I love Velvet Revolver. Just as I loved Stone Temple Pilots and Guns and Roses, the mixing of the 2, has been great. But, when I went to see them in November of 2004, it was pretty clear that Scott Weiland had not kicked his heroin problem. He got on stage, in a theater that was about 50 degrees, and in 15 minutes, he went from wearing about 4 layers on his torso, to being shirtless, and sweating like he was performing on the sun. Now, I know stage lights are hot, but c'mon. The thing is, my buddies and I laughed it off, and just sat there loving the music. But, if they sucked, all we would discuss is how drugs are ruining the band, and how Scott needs to get clean, and blah, blah.
My point is, lets check ourselves a bit before we start making judgment calls on artists, when we know we love them. And have some faith in music again. I was so skeptical about the inudstry, feeling like no one would perform unless they got paid ungodly sums of cash, but, to watch the Grammys, you felt the music alive again. And for a little while, I forgot I was sick, and just loved the show. So, find out where your favorite band is playing, and go see a live show. Its good for the soul.
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